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Coral Reefs Could Disappear Within Next 80 Years

The Onion - Thu, 2020-02-20 17:45

Researchers at the University of Hawaii predict that 90% of the world’s coral reefs could die in the next 20 years and that reefs could disappear entirely by 2100 as climate change increases ocean temperatures. What do you think?

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Categories: The Onion

Twin Cities Janitors and Guards Feature Climate and Housing in Their Strike Demands

Steward's Corner - Thu, 2020-02-20 17:13
Twin Cities Janitors and Guards Feature Climate and Housing in Their Strike Demands February 20, 2020 / Steve Payne<? if(isset($entity->premium) and $entity->premium == 1) { echo "Print Only"; } ?>

Update: Local 26 announced today that it will call a one-day strike next week by its 4,000 members who clean commercial office buildings. Earlier this week, the union reached a tentative agreement on a four-year contract covering 2,000 security officers, with raises of 14 percent.—Eds.

“Twin Cities janitors and security officers vote to authorize strike over pay and sick leave,” read the headline in the Minneapolis Star Tribune.

Categories: Labor Notes

Twin Cities Janitors and Guards Feature Climate and Housing in Their Strike Demands

Magazine Stories - Thu, 2020-02-20 17:13
Twin Cities Janitors and Guards Feature Climate and Housing in Their Strike Demands February 20, 2020 / Steve Payne<? if(isset($entity->premium) and $entity->premium == 1) { echo "Print Only"; } ?>

Update: Local 26 announced today that it will call a one-day strike next week by its 4,000 members who clean commercial office buildings. Earlier this week, the union reached a tentative agreement on a four-year contract covering 2,000 security officers, with raises of 14 percent.—Eds.

“Twin Cities janitors and security officers vote to authorize strike over pay and sick leave,” read the headline in the Minneapolis Star Tribune.

Categories: Labor Notes

God In Critical Condition

The Onion - Thu, 2020-02-20 17:01

The Lord God, Maker of Heaven and Earth, was rushed into emergency surgery after accidentally shooting Himself while cleaning His gun. Hear what doctors have to say about His chances of recovery.

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Categories: The Onion

Bloomberg Housekeepers Brace For Another Day Of Dressing Up Like DNC Candidates And Letting Boss Beat Them In Debate

The Onion - Thu, 2020-02-20 16:57

NEW YORK—Standing behind podiums scattered around the living room, Mike Bloomberg’s housekeepers braced for another day of dressing up like DNC candidates and letting their boss beat them in a debate, sources confirmed Thursday. “I’m supposed to be polishing the silver today, but instead I have to wear a stupid white…

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Categories: The Onion

Recently Concussed Americans March On Washington D.C. Demanding The Right To Sleep

The Onion - Thu, 2020-02-20 16:23

WASHINGTON—Meandering through the National Mall as they forgot where they were headed, thousands of recently concussed Americans marched on Washington D.C. Thursday demanding the right to sleep. “Every citizen deserves to go night-night for just a few minutes without being shaken awake by those who would insist we…

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Categories: The Onion

Biden Begging Donors To Stop Sending Money So He Can Quit Race

The Onion - Thu, 2020-02-20 15:47

WASHINGTON—Imploring his supporters to relieve him of his obligations on the campaign trail, former vice president and current presidential candidate Joe Biden reportedly begged his donors Thursday to stop sending him money so he could quit the presidential race. “Look, folks, we are at an important crossroads in our…

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Categories: The Onion

George Zimmerman Sues Buttigieg, Warren

The Onion - Thu, 2020-02-20 15:29

George Zimmerman, whose acquittal for shooting and killing Trayvon Martin sparked national debate, is suing Pete Buttigieg and Elizabeth Warren for defamation, claiming their tributes to Martin were attempts to “garner votes in the black community.” What do you think?

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Categories: The Onion

How To Handle Texting Anxiety

The Onion - Thu, 2020-02-20 13:48
Categories: The Onion

USA : The Cosmic Irony of Bernie Sanders's Rise

LabourStart US - Thu, 2020-02-20 11:10
Source: Jacobin

Increased Airtime Of Chantix Commercials Results In Ray Liotta Qualifying For Democratic Debate

The Onion - Wed, 2020-02-19 23:17

LAS VEGAS—In a powerful testament to the role television advertising still plays in driving national polls, increased airtime of commercials for tobacco cessation aid Chantix led to celebrity spokesperson Ray Liotta qualifying for Wednesday night’s Democratic Debate. “Chantix has made some especially aggressive ad…

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Categories: The Onion

‘I’ll Rule You Peasants With An Iron Fist,’ Says Bloomberg To Standing Ovation During DNC Debate

The Onion - Wed, 2020-02-19 22:23

LAS VEGAS—In a demonstration of the high level of enthusiasm the former New York City mayor enjoys among the electorate, surging presidential candidate Michael Bloomberg was met with a standing ovation during the Democratic debate Wednesday as he promised to “rule you peasants with an iron fist.” “Kneel before me and…

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Categories: The Onion
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