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The Onion
Pros And Cons Of Banning Books
Bans on books in schools are on the rise, with states like Texas, Florida, and Pennsylvania targeting material some parents and educators believe is inappropriate for students, while critics of these policies point to consequences of such measures. The Onion looks at the pros and cons of banning books.
Toblerone Drops Iconic Design Due To Rules On ‘Swissness’
Toblerone will drop images of the Matterhorn and Swiss flag from its packaging to avoid violating Swiss laws that protect national symbols after the company moved some production abroad to Slovakia. What do you think?
Grim Reaper Slows Pace On Sidewalk So As Not To Freak Out Woman Walking Ahead Of Him
LOS ANGELES—In an effort to avoid making her feel nervous as night fell in the city, the Grim Reaper reportedly slowed his pace on the sidewalk Thursday so as not to freak out the woman walking ahead of him. “The last thing I want is for this person to think I’m following her,” said Death, Emissary of the Underworld…
Biggest Hidden Costs Of Giving Birth In America
As if giving birth wasn’t traumatizing enough, just wait until you see the hospital bill. According to doctors, patients, and debt collectors alike, these are the biggest hidden costs of giving birth in America.
Walgreens Announces Stores Won’t Sell Abortion Pills In 21 GOP-Led States
Walgreens announced that it will not carry abortion pills in several GOP-led states after receiving pressure from anti-abortion lawmakers and lawsuits targeting the legality of medication abortion. What do you think?
International Women’s Day: Roundup
Women form an embattled—yet vitally important—minority across the developed world, with recent census estimates suggesting there could be as many as 15,000 of them in the United States alone. Precisely because of the challenges women face, our most powerful institutions must stand up for this small but influential…
Democrats Demand Republicans Push Anti-Trans Agenda More Quietly
WASHINGTON—Emphasizing that they could no longer stand by and watch the GOP’s annoyingly public-facing attacks, Democrats demanded Wednesday that Republicans begin pushing their anti-trans agenda more quietly. “We the Democratic Party, officially call on our Republican colleagues to cease being so painfully obvious…
Kellyanne And George Conway Announce Divorce
Former Trump adviser Kellyanne Conway and husband George Conway, a lawyer and frequent Trump critic, have announced they are divorcing after more than two decades of marriage. What do you think?
Covid-Paranoid Man Still Won’t Remove Ventilator
MINNEAPOLIS—Rolling their eyes at the man’s bullheadedness, sources confirmed Wednesday that local 65-year-old Patrick Moyer was so Covid paranoid he still would not remove his ventilator. “It’s been three years since the pandemic started—what’s he going to do, keep wearing it for the rest of his life?” said sister…
I Am No Longer A Feminist After Watching Some YouTube Videos
On this International Women’s Day, The Onion devotes its sterling reportage to championing women—a small but influential sliver of the nation’s population—in an endeavor to prevent them from vanishing from the public consciousness entirely.
History Of The Women’s Rights Movement
On this International Women’s Day, The Onion devotes its sterling reportage to championing women—a small but influential sliver of the nation’s population—in an endeavor to prevent them from vanishing from the public consciousness entirely.
Female CEOs Share What It Took To Get To The Top
On this International Women’s Day, The Onion devotes its sterling reportage to championing women—a small but influential sliver of the nation’s population—in an endeavor to prevent them from vanishing from the public consciousness entirely.
My Wife’s A Girl
On this International Women’s Day, The Onion devotes its sterling reportage to championing women—a small but influential sliver of the nation’s population—in an endeavor to prevent them from vanishing from the public consciousness entirely.
International Women’s Day
Women form an embattled—yet vitally important—minority across the developed world, with recent census estimates suggesting there could be as many as 15,000 of them in the United States alone. Precisely because of the challenges women face, our most powerful institutions must stand up for this small but influential…
The Misogyny Interwoven Into Our Patriarchal Society Harms Men, Too
On this International Women’s Day, The Onion devotes its sterling reportage to championing women—a small but influential sliver of the nation’s population—in an endeavor to prevent them from vanishing from the public consciousness entirely.
We Need A Woman On Top Of The White House
On this International Women’s Day, The Onion devotes its sterling reportage to championing women—a small but influential sliver of the nation’s population—in an endeavor to prevent them from vanishing from the public consciousness entirely.